The Toilet Roll Hunt

Yesterday, I went on a toilet roll hunt without much success.

I went to every address.

I sought it here, I sought it there, I sought it everywhere.

Sadly, everybody seems to be having the squits at the same time, and there was none to be seen,

but I did manage to stock up on caffeine.

However, I managed to get two kitchen rolls, that should do the job.

If I need to go for a bob.

______

Seriously you guys, stop pinching the blinking bog roll, you're not the only one who needs to pee,

this is getting a bit creepy.

After all, I don't think that having toilet roll is the problem here,

I think that some people may have had too much beer.

I've only got one toilet roll left and I'm feeling a bit blue, 

so supermarkets, instead of letting everyone have trolley fulls, shouldn't you be saying, one sheet or two?